Thursday, 17 March 2016

The Communication and Relationship Factor: Dealing with People

The learning process is an interesting journey to embark on.
When it comes to dealing with people, most of us find it quite difficult. Everyone seems to have their own egoistic nature that they will not allow to be bruised. However like in most games,  there are always winners and losers. Choosing to be a winner or loser in our relationships with people is a personal choice. I mostly hear people say play the fool and let the issues die. I beg to differ. We all have specific attitudes and behaviours that can make a relationship thrive which must not be overlooked.

Know your role

In dealing with people, it is advisable to know what you stand for in their life. If you are the leader, it is good to be firm. Mind you, you are trying to be liked and to be obeyed at the same time. Does that mean you must be a dictator in order to be obeyed? It is key to note that people will get offended no matter how we treat them. That is not to say that we must treat them anyhow anyway. If you know your role as a friend,  family, sister, aunt, teacher, in another person's life, you learn words and actions that can easily communicate to the person. Choose words that do not easily offend the person's personality. Applaud and rebuke, but in a way that resonates your exact sentiments to the person without them feeling offended.

Respect other's views

In as much as we all share different opinions in life, it is important to listen  and understand before we communicate. I find it very unapologetic when people refuse to listen and later give bad judgment of a situation. I bet this is not taught in most of our classrooms. However,  any good communication book will teach you the importance of listening and understanding before communicating . After listening, it helps you understand the angle from which the other party is coming from. This way, we are able to give a good if not better response. Never rubbish another person's view on a situation just because you disagree.

Speak with empathy

How does it feel when after telling someone your situation the person speaks to you with so much concern and love? That is exactly what empathy seeks to achieve. You are able to connect with someone's opinion, be in their shoes, and communicate well in relation to their very self. Once you begin to attack another without truly understanding them, you open yourself to disagreements.

Be soft and firm

The truth is that not all persons can handle being treated with persuasion, sometimes it is good to be firm for others to get the message. In the bid to be firm and frank, we also do not want to appear difficult, tough or controversial (some terms given to firm people). In this way, we can communicate firmness and softness in a way that resonates true concerns, with words that will not be misunderstood or misconstrued. Literally, what this means is let your yes be yes, and your no be no.

The focus of this is to try as much as possible not to step on so many toes while dealing with people in our everyday lives. Do share how best you communicate with people with us. The aim is to be able to win more friends and influence more people rather than more enemies or ill wishers.

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