Things You Need To Know Before You Start A New Relationship

Relationships are a tricky business. If the goals, motivations, and expectations of both people involved don’t mesh well together, the whole affair is doomed to go down in flames. As easy as it is to shrug it off and blame it on the other person, there are certain things everyone needs to accomplish in their own life before they can be a good partner. If you want your next relationship to be better than your last one, tick off the eight items on this list before checking out another dating website.

1. Become Who You Want to Be

Step one is to ask yourself if you are the person you wanted to be growing up. What attitudes do you admire in other people? What are your personal weaknesses? Make a list if you have to, of all the personality traits you would like to have and get to work cultivating them. Practice makes perfect.

2. Create an Amazing Life

If you aren’t excited about the life you are living why would anyone else want to be a part of it? Do things that make you happy and get you excited for each new day. Find things to look forward to and share them with the people around you. If your life looks like enough fun, odds are you won’t need to go looking for love. It will beat a path to your door.

3. Find Your Passion

Part of creating an amazing life is finding at least one thing you can be really passionate about. Maybe you love exploring the outdoors. Maybe it is art that really gets you excited. Whatever it is, identify it and make it as big a part of your life as you can.

4. Leave the Past in the Past

Everyone has had things happen to them that they would rather forget, but not everyone has baggage. Memories only become baggage if you dwell on them and refuse to move on. Learn to let go of the people who are no longer in your life and forget the ones who let you down. Move on and set your sights on the horizon.

5. Get Organized

When you feel like you are in control of your life you will be more confident and more attractive. Organize everything. Clean your house. Clean your car. Trim down your Facebook friends list. No one wants to be in a relationship with a panicky scatterbrained and odds are if you are one you have a hard time relaxing. Get it together, man.

6. Take Care of Yourself

Do everything in your power to maximize your personal energy. Fill your life with things that make you happy and enthusiastic. Maybe running makes you feel great. Maybe it’s lifting weights. Maybe it's going for a walk before work. Just do something to make yourself feel healthy and happy.

7. Learn to Accept Other People

One of the toughest things you learn in life is that other people don’t exist to satisfy your expectations of them. Accept other people for who they are and learn to embrace their flaws. A good relationship is one where both people can feel comfortable and at home. Judging people is a great way to get them headed for the door.

8. Love Life

Dwight Eisenhower once said “Pessimism never won a war” and the same applies to life. With all the negativity that already exists in the world (ex. missile strikes, bombings, celebrity gossip columns, etc.) no one in your life needs to hear about the things you think suck. Focus on the positive. Find things about the world you love. Only when you are happy about the life you have can you successfully try to expand it.

Credit : lifehack.org

MANESSEH'S 7 WRITING TIPS FOR WRITERS

"Criticism to the writer is like greetings to the man who farms by the way side. If you pay too much attention to what people say about your work, you will lose your talent." - Manesseh Azure Awuni

Manesseh Azure Awuni is the senior broadcast journalist at Joy 99.7FM, an Accra based English speaking radio station. He also won the 2012 Ghana Journalist of the year award, after sweeping three other awards that same night. Manesseh is a prolific writer, who reads for pleasure, and does writing as his hobby. Here are his seven tips for writers and aspiring ones alike (in his exact words and tone).

Read a lot

Abraham Lincoln once said if he was given eight hours to chop a tree, he would spend six hours sharpening his axe. I say if you want to be a good writer, dedicate 80% of your effort to reading and 20% to writing.

Keep it simple

The office cleaner is your reader. The University professor is also your reader. The only way to satisfy both of them is to keep your writing simple.

Right use of adjectives

Use adjectives advisedly. Like too much salt, they mar the beauty and credibility of your writing, especially non-fiction.

Use simple words

Don't try to impress your readers with knowledge of "big" words. The use of unfamiliar or fanciful words is not the hallmark of good writer. A good writer is one who uses simple or ordinary words but weaves them in a way that tickles the reader.

Be positive towards criticism

Criticism to the writer is like greetings to the man who farms by the wayside. If you pay too much attention to what people say about your work, you will lose your talent.

Be yourself when writing

Learning to write like someone else is like imitating the left-handed. It is good to have favorite writers and study their styles, but when you settle down to write, be yourself. With time, a reader should be able to identify your work even if it doesn't bear your name. You only achieve this by being yourself.

Practise writing

I don't think writing is a special gift from God. It is one of those general gifts that anyone can enhance through learning. I am yet to see a good writer who does not read or an illiterate writer. Creativity, which enhances writing, can be a special gift from God, but not writing itself. God has not given you that special gift to write. The more you read and practise writing, the better you become. You have no excuse not to write.

Personally, these tips give me a ride back to the classroom. They are all professional and helpful. Every writer must cling on to it, especially my beginner friends. Have your say. Drop your questions and comments below.

9 Tips on how Best to Deliver your Speech

By Alicia Prince

Study your Topic

The better you know the subject you’re
talking about, the less likely you’ll be to
stumble when the big day comes. If
possible, pick a topic you know a lot about
or are interested in, so you start off
confident in your knowledge. If you can’t
pick your topic, don’t despair. Research the
topic you’re going to speak on, especially
points you’re not too familiar with.
Thoroughly knowing your material will help
you speak with authority. It will also help
boost your confidence before, and while you
speak.

Practise.

Now that you know your subject inside and
out, practice your speech as often as
possible. Practice in front of the mirror or
with a few friends, whichever you’re
comfortable with. Practice will help you
gauge how long your speech is, and where
changes may need to be made. Plus,
practicing out loud a few times will help you
feel familiar with your speech the day of the
event. Growing comfortable with your
speech is essential if you’d like to eliminate
“um”s, “like”s and other distracting pauses.

Know your audience

When in the practice stage, it’s a good idea
to consider who your audience is. Are you
speaking to young kids with short attention
spans, or an older crowd that appreciates
direct, solemn communication? If you’ve
taken time to craft your speech specifically
to your audience , you’ll feel less out of
place when you go to address the crowd.

Make friends

Try and mingle with the audience before the
event starts. By shaking hands and chatting
with the audience first, you’ll feel a bit more
at home when you need to stand at the
front. If, like most of us, you get nervous
when speaking in public, a warm, familiar
smile from audience members can make all
the difference. Especially if you’re speaking
to strangers, you’ll have some familiar faces to focus on while your talking.

Get comfortable

Another way to lessen pre-speech jitters is to arrive early. Familiarize yourself with the space, and make sure you test any AV or visual aid equipment. Not only will you be
less likely to run into technical difficulties mid-speech, you’ll also get another chance to practice your material once or twice.

Be welcoming

Start your speech with a warm welcome to
the audience, and possibly a quick joke or
story . By starting out with a few colloquial
items, you’ll have a minute to adjust to your position and calm your nerves a bit. Additionally, we all seem most relaxed when
discussing something in a conversational matter, allowing you an opportunity to take
control of your speech. Plus, by grabbing the audiences attention first, you can help the audience warm up to you.

Visualize

Though it may seem silly, visualization is a
technique used by successful people around
the world – from business moguls to athletes. Visualize yourself giving the best, most rousing version of your speech to help
you feel confident during your address. Not only does this help nerves, it’s another way to practice and reinforce your material in your head.

Relax

Relaxation techniques are a must before going on, even if you’re a seasoned public speaker. No one likes watching someone who seems uncomfortable, even if what they’re saying is useful. Deep breathing techniques, a cup of tea, or a short walk can
all go along way towards making you look like a natural.

Exude confidence

Finally, even if your stomach is in knots and your knees are shaking, try to project confidence during your speech. Use appropriate eye contact, project your voice,
and gesture normally to appear relaxed.
Even if you feel out of place, approaching your topic with confidence will maximize the
audiences desire to pay attention. If there's a glitch with the equipment or you misspeak, laugh it off and keep going. The
audience will be less likely to focus on imperfections if you ignore them too.

Source: lifehack.org

MAKE THE HOME A HAVEN FOR CHILDREN

As the saying goes, "Charity begins at home", so does the child from a good home have the likelihood of greater opportunities in life. The home or family is the first point of socialization of the child. The better he or she is treated at home, the happier and easier life is for the child.

It is quite worrying the kinds of homes children grow up in these days. We see a lot of chaos in our society today due to the places we have allowed children grow up. One key factor is that these places are mostly not conducive enough to raise children.

Most children do not wake up to see their biological parents these days. These parents have employed house helps who play the parental roles in the lives of children. Meanwhile, parents spend all the time at work to the neglect of the well being of their children. In the end, they pick up negative behaviors such as stealing, disobedience, fornication, telling lies just to mention but a few. This is due to the fact that these house helps are not able to handle them appropriately.

I witnessed an instance when a younger cousin of mine took to sneaking out at night to meet her boyfriend. This happened for a long time until she was caught one day. Apparently, the house help who was supposed to keep an eye on her always allowed the boy in question to visit her at home regularly (in the absence of her parents). And since the house help closed the doors at night, she allowed my cousin to sneak out most times and opened the doors for her when she returned.If any parent will need the services of an house help, they should equally be around most of the times to supervise what happens in the home.

Again, broken homes and single parenting has become the order of the day. What happened to couples staying in the marriage above all odds for the love of their children(an object of their love)? I must say firmly at this point that I am strongly against divorce under any circumstance (especially when there are kids involved). The alarming rate of divorce is quite pathetic because it no longer provides the children the needed environment to grow positively.

Alot of children raised by single parents are mostly unhappy and depressed. The frustrations and hurts of the partner who caters for the child, are directly and indirectly channelled to the innocent child. These children sometimes suffer severe beatings, child labour, rape, insecurity and no sense of belonging.

7 out of 10 children who grow in such homes become wayward and independent at a tender age. This is because that one parent can never play two roles in the child's life. They give up too soon when the weight becomes heavier on them. At this point, the child becomes the master of their own lives. Parents who see signs of inconvenience in bringing up their children in such homes can ask other competent relatives to cater for the child until they are back up on their feet.

Another area of concern is a disorganised home. Here, I mean a home where the members are not morally or socially upright. Some homes house all manner of people such as drug addicts, prostitutes, fraudsters, and the likes. This is mostly typical of slums and compound houses. However, a parent should be able to scrutinize a place before going to live there with their children.

If the environment poses a threat for the child, it must be changed. Otherwise, the child may as well be moved out of such a place to avoid corrupting his or her behavior. Remember, children pick up traits in their immediate environment as they grow up. Therefore, the kind of place they grow up in can play very significant role in their lives.

The appropriate home for a child is one that encourages him or her to become the best of who they can be. Any person who plays the parental role of the child must try as much as possible to make them happy. A happy child is mostly a healthy, smart and productive child.

I will be very glad if the institutions in charge of child cases will take up the challenge of ensuring the happiness of children growing up. DOVVSU, Social welfare and development, the various orphanages, teachers, and the immediate family must rise up to the course of promoting safe and  sound environment for children.

Do not forget also that for a child, good parents or guardians, healthy meal, comfortable clothes, playing and play materials, quality education, and a happy home(no matter where), are prerequisite for a happy living.

Signed : @switsixta_stica

IF YOU RELENT, YOU HAVE NOT RE-LEARNT.

A story is told of a butterfly which lived in the most beautiful of gardens in that time. When it was born, it never had wings, and never could fly. Day in and out, its friends flew past it showing the most empathy they could. Some rather whispered mocking words at it.

Each day, this insect was stuck on the tree perching on the leaves and seeing all the attractiveness around it. It mostly cried about its inability to fly around to enjoy the beautiful things around it.

One day, as it awoke from bed, it knew that was the time. Butterfly felt something stuck around its body. This new feeling made it difficult for it to move around. Whatever it was was so stuck to it that it rather wished it had not grown after all. And yet day by day, it waited patiently to see how this new development would turn out.

A few months past, everyone was amazed at the new butterfly. It had grown beautiful wings and was ready to grace many occasions which took place in the garden. Soon, it was elected as king of the garden because of it's beauty, intelligence and confidence, besides other wonderful qualities it possessed.

Just like the butterfly story, many are subjected to numerous setbacks and frustrations in life. I am one of them. We all, at one point in life, feel caged by circumstances beyond our control. We are stuck to believing that we are of no use or importance to humanity.

We sometimes feel intimidated by the mere success of our fellow persons. What we mostly forget is that no one person ended up the way they are today. Everyone has their own story to tell. The earlier we appreciated who we are, the better person we will become.

A wise man once said that before you go knocking on the door of responsibility, peep through the windows. This is to say that you may not be ready for the mantle you so much yearn to carry. In all the stages life, there is a lesson to pick up. Today may or may not be good. But there is hope in tomorrow.

Some people do not wait till their wings are fully strong for them to fly at ease. Some rush into numerous lifestyles that they later on regret. Some who regret never come out and choose the alternative of ending it all. The wise ones are those who allow time to heal them. The wise ones learn to build strong morals and skills for their personal development.

Whenever there is situation beyond your control, I always recommend that you take a deep breath, drink some water and think of the good times in your life. The walk to success is mostly long and stressful. But the rewards thereof is worth fighting for.

You can not live in someone else's dream, you must find and tap your potential where you are, with whatever tools you have. Never give up. The Law of Process says, Whatever great things we want to achieve in our lives is built daily, and not in a day. Learn to grow by the passing of each day.

Signed :@switsixta_stica

TIPS ON HOW YOU CAN LOVE RIGHT

All too soon you have a crush on someone. Then you realise that you two are meant to be together. When the both of you are together,  you can feel the mechanism and attraction. Cool, is it not? All too soon you must decide to keep this person. This can be very tough in your brain. A few tips below:

Fall in love
There's no mincing words. If you love the person, fall in love. Be there for them. Spend time with them. Trade quality time and resources for them. Yes, real love never thinks twice. If it's bound to be, it will be. Just allow yourself to be in tune with the moment. Dance to the music, it may never fade if you keep enjoying the rhythm.

Shake off mistrust
Many relationships do not thrive because of mistrust. One partner becomes so nosy. There is always something bothering him/her. He or she keeps wondering if they are in the right commitment. True, we must be careful sometimes. However, as time goes on your partner senses the insecurity in your eyes and this paves way for cheating. Feel confident that you own your partner. Only raise alarm when there is enough proof. Do not base your doubts on mere speculations. Be true to yourself first.

Talk to each other
Communication is the bridge that seals the connection between the two of you. Chat about everything. Build confidence in each other by talking most of the time. Apart from close friends and relatives, your partner should be the one you can confide in. Talk about the good, bad, secrets, jokes, experiences and practically everything interesting. A good relationship thrives much on this factor. Love is a means of applying verbal and non verbal communication. When you learn to talk to each other, you are able to break the occurrence of secrecy and dishonesty in the relationship.

Study your partner
What are their likes and dislikes? What turns them on? What irritates them? Their favorite food, game, places. Every human being has their own characteristics which complete them. Find out these things and use them for the benefit of the relationship. Use their likes to impress them, and their dislikes should help you not offend them. Spice up your love for them with the things they love. For instance if he likes football, spend time together watching it with him. Studying your partner aims at helping you pass out as their best and overall choice.

Do not worry if these tips do not work out. Some people are just meant to let go of. Seek out for the best because that is what you deserve. Learn to easily let go and pave way for something original. A person who knows his or her worth tends to be happy most of the time. Love fully, and the same measure or even greater will come back to you. Forget the losers and heart breakers. Love is real when real recognises real. Keep loving.

SETTING THE PRIORITIES RIGHT- A Step Towards Nation Building

It is important to note that in every nation, there are targets or goals that drive it's leaders and citizens towards development. This is one factor that even individuals dwell on for personal development. A nation like Ghana is a thriving developing country in the West African diaspora. In the past few years, she has struggled in battling it's economy to attain the right grounds for national growth.

Tourist sites
Let's face it, our tourist sites can set the pace in boosting our sinking economy. How? In my opinion, government should post young graduates at some of the important tourist sites as part of their national service. Aburi gardens, Boti falls, Elmina Castle, Paga crocodile pond, and the likes are potential income generators. Government should focus all its human and capital resources on developing these places. In turn, revenue collected in these areas can turn our nation around. It is of no wonder that the white man sees a lot of gold on our land, contrary to what the black man sees. I also believe that there is a huge foreign exchange which can also improve the standard of living of the people. Monies derived here can go into development of roads, schools, hospitals and other major facilities in the areas where they are located.

Agriculture
A quick question. What do students go to read agricultural related courses in school for? I suppose your mind is filled with a lot of questions by now. Well, so is mine. These students can for instance be given a vast land where every agricultural student can go and practise on before and after school (precisely national service). Come to think of it, are farmers in Ghana given the needed support and attention at all? It is normal to hear about government tackling one project or the other. When it comes to agriculture and farming, I must say the nation is gradually failing. The extent to which we import foreign foods into the country is rather worrying. Our own local products are been traded for other "insignificant" goods. These goods are relatively the cause of the many diseases like obesity, diabetes, food poisoning, in our country. What happened to consuming our own local fish, rice, pawpaw, yam, pepper and what have you? Government should channel more resources into training and equipping farmers with skills, tools, machines and agricultural materials, which will contribute to the growth of quality farm produce. Road networks in farming areas can also be properly constructed to serve as proper channels for the sale and distribution of farm products into other regions. This will be a great step towards boosting foreign exchange and income in the country. It will also reduce excessive import, create job avenues, and provide healthy food for the people.

Empowering labour force
Another great step towards making a U-turn in the current economic state is by mentorship, training, and sponsorship of great minds and inventions of the people. The human capital of every country adds up to the other factors of production to make a headstart in any form of production. Yearly, students and other stakeholders initiate innovative projects, which if properly supervised and sponsored could have made a wave for the nation. It is easy for the "big men" to sponsor pageantry rather than life changing projects and inventions. One person making the lead in technological innovation is Dr. Kwadwo Safo Katanka. This man, I must say, has started something great and we must embrace it with all our might before it slips off our hands. How refreshing is it to know that Ghanaians drive in their own car model without having to import from somewhere? A lot of Ghanaian dreams are dying because of lack of support from the right sources. This I must say should be properly looked at. The skilled people should be given the needed platforms to unearth what is in them. This will go a long way to generate likewise great minds from all walks to patronize their skills and expertise. Enough of employing unprofessionals into tackling serious businesses. The right people when given the right training and empowerment can help save the nation by attracting the needed investors.

To all the impact players in all the various industries in Ghana, I say keep on. We need a corruption free nation. We need dedicated nation shakers and movers. We need a healthy and developing Ghana.

Signed : @switsixta_stica